Notes from a user - Find Someone and NZDating

By Love and Relationships Staff

Hi, I’m a professional looking to meet a great guy for a relationship. I’m fun and ambitious, love my family and enjoy spending time with my friends.

Finding myself single in my early 30’s I was getting sick of going to Auckland bars full of drunk men with wedding bands who flirted, but weren’t available. Going out to meet single guys was getting more complicated, so I decided to get on the internet. I signed up with both Find Someone and NZDating, the two sites I’d been recommended by my friends.

And for what it’s worth, this is how it was for me.

NZDating

- I found NZDating to be full of men who were married or had partners, but were keen for a rendezvous
- I got sent lots of suggestive messages and photos with men’s bits, even though I had set my options not to receive them
- I was contacted by lesbian women and people wanting threesomes even though I specified that I wanted men for relationships
- I found the guys on this site to be more “blue collar”

Find Someone

- The photos were of a high quality compared with NZDating, so you got to have a better look at who you were chatting to
- The people on this site were more likely to be professionals and actually single. There were a lot of people who had been away overseas and had come back to NZ, and were looking for a relationship
- I didn’t receive any sexually suggestive messages like I did on NZ Dating (although some of my friends have)
- Everybody talked up their interests and made themselves out to be a lot more interesting than they actually were in person. Including me (hehe)

As you can see, my experience of the two sites and the people I met was very different. Given that I wanted to meet someone special and have a relationship, Find Someone was definitely the site for me.

And how did it go? Well I went on a few dates with a number of guys. Sometimes I knew when I walked in the door that it wasn’t going to work. A couple I keep in touch with as friends. And there was a guy I went out with for a while, but we recently went our separate ways. At the moment I’m enjoying being by myself and working out what is important to me in a relationship. When I’m ready it’s likely I’ll give the internet another go.
 

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NZDating and Findsomeone Created by Daisy on 12/05/2011 19:13:16 New Comment I have been on these and Match.com and to be honest although initially I found these sites both entertaining and flattering, I quickly came to the conclusion that the men on there were either desperate and were easily upset if you nicely told them you weren't interested, or they were so full of themselves and their needs they felt you needed to see their anatomy instead of their faces! I gave it a decent length of time and now realise, that I am unlikley to find someone on these sites, unless you are lucky and live in the same area as someone you happen to get to meet. New Comment Created by Rhi on 11/05/2010 21:18:36 i met my bf on NZDating. we been together now for 6 months. and its great. the trouble with u girls is you need to trust your instincts. there are good men and bad men everywhere. New Comment Created by MoMo on 11/05/2010 20:59:17 thanks for the tips. think i will just hang out and hope to meet someone through my mates New Comment Created by Bex on 11/05/2010 20:27:44 I've done NZ Dating and all they wanted was a shag and show me how big they were. New Comment Created by Buddy Love on 02/05/2010 01:52:54 It’s hard out there girlfriend! Mr right is just around the corner when you least expect him to be there. I thought I would never find him – on-line or at a bar – but I did! His name is Steven and we’ve been together for nine months now and going strong. Don’t give up! New Comment Created by joj on 28/04/2010 21:11:08 I actually prefer NZDating... Post A Comment Your Name Title Comment New Comment Enter the code