Giving gifts to girl you’ve just started dating - Should you do it?

By Love and Relationships Staff

The new girl I’m dating is lovely. So lovely that I want to shower her with presents, just to let her know. But will it work? What impression will it give? Will it be seen as coming on too strong? What type of gift is appropriate? Lingerie perhaps? And what am I trying to prove by giving a gift anyway?

I had no idea what to do, so I emailed my old friend Alicia. Alicia gets more attention from blokes in a day than I get from women in a year. And being a journo with integrity I don’t exaggerate. So she knows all about blokes and presents. Alicia emailed me back the next day:

Hey Dave, what girl doesn’t like getting presents? But good questions, and I think I can help.

I’ve had flowers every week from some of my admirers and I’m thinking, yeah I know I’m gourgeous, but this is OTT to the max. But that’s me and we ladies are all different.

Recently I read a book called the Five Love Languages, by Gary Chapman.

The love languages refer to the way in which a person likes to receive expressions of love. According to Gary the 5 love languages are:

1. Quality Time
2. Words of Affirmation
3. Acts of Service
4. Physical Touch
And last but not least,
5. Receiving Gifts.

So the question might be: does this girl like receiving gifts? Or are you just wasting your money? Do you know her well enough?

According to Gary, liking to receive gifts is not about materialism, but about the thoughtfulness, love and effort that you put into the gift.

Not every woman will have Receiving Gifts as her “love language” and not every woman will appreciate your intent. Some may be suspicious, as most women aren’t use to being given something, especially so early on in a relationship. Some may think you are going to end up being a stalker. Remember, you may lust after her, and you guys may get on well but it may seem a bit weird and obsessive.

For me, I’d wait until you know here better and can work out what it is she likes and wants from you. That way, you’ll really blow her away. So Dave, hold tight, play it cool. Maybe a gift here and there, or something to show you like her. But whatever you do, don’t go crazy on the credit card.
And Dave, my love language isn’t about receiving gifts, but with all this advice I’ve been giving you lately you at least owe me a vino?

I finished reading the email and leant back in my chair. My back was a bit sore from a hard morning at my desk, but that was cool. Alicia had just saved me hundreds of dollars, and possibly stopped me looking like a stalker. Maybe I did owe her a vino.

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