Is he cheating?

By Love and Relationships Staff

It’s true that some men will cheat on women from the outset of a relationship, but most men are not like that. Most men that cheat often fall into it a relationship has grown stale and lacks the sexual and emotional excitement that there was at the start. It is often the case that men cheat, not because they don’t love their partner, but because that spark has gone out of their relationship, their work, their lives. An affair can often be simply an attempt to find life again in a drab world. Being honest with yourself and talking to him about the state of the relationship is crucial, and can help to prevent him from cheating on you.

So what signs should you look for, if you suspect your man is cheating on you:

1. If you know your man well, your intuition will pick-up that something isn’t right. If you are really in tune with how your man is, it is likely you will sense that things are not going well with him long before any cheating has started. Understanding him and talking to him can nip any temptation to cheat in the bud, long before anything has happened.

2. Major changes in his behaviour. If you have the gut feeling that things are not going well between you, one thing to look for is drastic changes in his behaviour. 

He starts paying much more attention to how he looks. After a time couples tend to become more comfortable around each other – they get sloppy with how they dress, grow a little fat together and may pay less attention to hygiene. If he starts to look snappy, smell good and get into shape, it could be that there is someone else on the scene. It is true that while a man may love his partner, if he doesn’t find her attractive anymore, he will be especially vulnerable to temptation.

- He seems to be much happier in general. Well, that’s a kick in the teeth, isn’t it. But it’s true. If you have been together for a while, the routine and boredom can really get a man down. Meeting someone new will give him new life, put spring in his step and a smile on his face. Very few men can hide that.

- If he stops displaying affection for you as he did before, it is surely a sign that there are problems in the relationship, and it could be that he is cheating on you.

- If he was the type that left always left his mobile phone lying around, but now it’s always on him, something could be up? Then again, perhaps it’s simply because he doesn’t want to miss your calls.

- He starts talking about things or doing things that he never was interested in before. If he’s just bought a Paulo Coehlo book something’s definitely up.

- He doesn’t say “I love you” anymore

- He’s much more attentive, or less attentive, than he used to be.

- He is defensive when you ask him questions or won’t offer information about his whereabouts.

- He starts to become suspicious of you and your behaviour. As Bono once sang, ‘It’s no secret a liar won’t believe anybody else`.

- An affair takes time and organisation. He must be somewhere other than where he told you, so if he’s suddenly going to a number of unusual places, spending much more time with friends, or the classic ‘working late’, it could be that something is up.

- He is reluctant to talk about the future anymore, perhaps because he is unsure if he wants it to be with you or not.

 Unfortunately cheating does happen. While its cold comfort, there are some tell-tale signs that this could be happening in your relationship.

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